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May militias

5/1/2020

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Even living in the south since puberty, I'm considered a damn Yankee. But I'm well aware of getting hit with stereotypes that don't stand up in the light of day. Which means I'm kinda used to hearing things like, "if you want to find a lot of KKK supporters per capita, you really need to go to Indiana."
And if you want to find the freakiest militia, you need to go to Michigan.
We've kind of forgotten that lately, what with the Bundys and their antics in Nevada and Oregon over the last few years. But Michigan has some long standing nuttier than squirrel turds militias going back at least 30 years.
The Michigan Militia officially formed in the early 90's. Calling themselves the Wolverines (because fanboying a movie that was obsolete the month after it came out in theaters is really a way to get people to take you seriously) they were a punchline in a lot of op-eds. I vaguely remember them claiming that American servicemembers all had microchips implanted in their butts as a condition of enlistment and/or commission.
Their first leader was a former AF officer and Baptist minister (go fig) who put out a press release after the Oklahoma City Bombing claiming it was done by Japan as revenge for the Tokyo subway sarin gas attacks. That was too weird even for them, and he stepped down before it showed up that Tim MicVeigh had attended some meetings.
And these yahoos are what's left.
Like most professional protesters, they're well aware of how obnoxious they can get without being rolled up by the cops. And let's face it, people dressed normally quietly participating in local politics doesn't make for good pictures at press time. That's why the only person arrested was a counter-protester, who decided they had the right to rip a flag out of someone's hands.
So they have guns? Concealed carry's prohibited in the capital, but open carry isn't. I've yet to see a booger hook on a bang switch, so they're being better than some range goblins I've met.
"But guns scare me!" Whoopty fucking do. You've been cheering on guillotines for months, suck it the fuck up.
I'm personally much more annoyed that they crowded tight spaces and went unmasked. Social distance fail there, guys.
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