So, a little over a year ago, my metamour's estranged father passed away.
I had never met him, and frankly never expected to.
I definitely did not expect to spend most of 2022 dealing with him and his bullshit.
I found this out on set. On my last day of filming. I was between setups when I got a text from Abby saying "How do I unload this?"
Thus began a saga.
(Side note to my fellow gun nuts:
No.
Take your thirsty elsewhere.
I know you have wet dreams about this kind of thing.
Still no.
Everything went to nice homes and were tragically lost in boating accidents the next day.
Don't even bother. I can and will block your ass.
End side note.)
The cops had found His body during a wellness check and notified Indi, what with them being an only child and all. So they went up with Abby to try and find any needed paperwork and to secure the house and anything particularly valuable or dangerous.
Which is when we found out that He was in some yet-unknown classification between a prepper, a hoarder, and a squirrel.
When it became obvious that I was gonna be of minimal help while trying to finish the shooting day, Abby went on youtube and found out how to unload and clear everything they'd found at that point.
So I came home from set with my gear bag to find the miscellaneous table in my studio had grown exponentially. Over the next couple of months we'd find still more in weird places. It got to the point where we established a code word just because Abby had gotten tired of hearing "found another one."
On the third or fourth weekend, one of us discovered a hidden compartment in the floor of the closet, concealing six cans full of ammo.
I'm not gonna give a full laundry list of everything we found (amidst all of the other stuff). I will, however, say that I ran out of locks and cases securing the man's ordnance and had to run out to get more.
I'm a Xennial, Oregon trail, late gen X, elder millenial, whatever you want to call it. The surviving parents of my polycule are all Boomers. I realize I'm not the first person this is gonna happen to, and I'm gonna be far from the last.
So, if you're a gun owner:
One, try and at least be able to lock up all of your weapons at once.
Two, put in writing what you want to go to who in the event of your demise. Combinations to any safes should also be included in your will and similar papers.
So, if you wind up being an heir or an executor:
Whatever you find, point the muzzle in a safe direction, unload and clear. If you need them, Youtube should have tutorials. Last time youtube censored a lot of gun stuff, pornhub took up the slack.
You don't technically need a safe. Anything you can lock it inside and prevent fuckery should do the immediate job. Hard golf club cases can secure most long guns. Toolboxes and chests can secure pistols. Make sure they lock and the keys/combinations are kept secure.
Some states treat firearms like any other property as far as inheritance goes. Other states may have specific laws directing them. Check with your probate lawyer. And don't rely on being in a currently-red state to be a substitute for checking, either.
So, probate court is done, the state says they're yours now, and you don't want 'em.
What to do with them?
There's options.
One, you can ask a gun nut friend to help you get rid of them. Some may offer to buy them outright, others will help you with one of the other options.
You may have noticed in my sidebar above, but a common though morbid joke in the gun community is an older gent asking too high a price for a given weapon, to which the younger potential buyer will reply, "OK. I'll just buy it off your gun-hating kid at your estate sale."
It should go without saying that a GOOD gun nut friend will be more concerned for you than for a potential bargain. They'll still be *interested* in said bargain, but they'll care about you first.
Two, a number of gun shops and a number of pawn shops buy as well as sell. I keep saying that guns are like cars, and this is a place where that's true again: make, model, and condition will go a long way in determining the price you can get. In a straight sale, you *might* be able to get around 60% of what it can retail for on the used market. Your mileage varies a lot here.
Three, if you have a large collection (more than 10 or so) or several particularly valuable pieces, renting a table at a gun show might be an option. Especially if you've also inherited ammunition and/or accessories you've no use for. Unfortunately, unless you really know the market and are naturally good at sales, this option will likely be more of a hassle than it's worth.
Four, if you know how to sell on ebay, Gunbroker operates in a similar fashion, but with additional steps to make it legal. Choose an FFL near you (probably a local gun store). When you sell, take the weapon to said FFL, which will ship it to another FFL near the buyer (both of them taking a fee for their trouble) who will do the buyer's background check and finish the sale there.
Five, police buyback programs are sporadic, but chances are there's one happening in a major city near you sometime in the next year.
Six, if all else fails, you can surrender a firearm to a local police station. You might have to drop it off yourself (unloaded and in a box, please). They probably won't give you anything for it and will make no guarantees as to what happens to it next. But it will be out of your life and no longer your problem.
As always, hope the info helps.
Take care of yourselves out there,
- J.
I had never met him, and frankly never expected to.
I definitely did not expect to spend most of 2022 dealing with him and his bullshit.
I found this out on set. On my last day of filming. I was between setups when I got a text from Abby saying "How do I unload this?"
Thus began a saga.
(Side note to my fellow gun nuts:
No.
Take your thirsty elsewhere.
I know you have wet dreams about this kind of thing.
Still no.
Everything went to nice homes and were tragically lost in boating accidents the next day.
Don't even bother. I can and will block your ass.
End side note.)
The cops had found His body during a wellness check and notified Indi, what with them being an only child and all. So they went up with Abby to try and find any needed paperwork and to secure the house and anything particularly valuable or dangerous.
Which is when we found out that He was in some yet-unknown classification between a prepper, a hoarder, and a squirrel.
When it became obvious that I was gonna be of minimal help while trying to finish the shooting day, Abby went on youtube and found out how to unload and clear everything they'd found at that point.
So I came home from set with my gear bag to find the miscellaneous table in my studio had grown exponentially. Over the next couple of months we'd find still more in weird places. It got to the point where we established a code word just because Abby had gotten tired of hearing "found another one."
On the third or fourth weekend, one of us discovered a hidden compartment in the floor of the closet, concealing six cans full of ammo.
I'm not gonna give a full laundry list of everything we found (amidst all of the other stuff). I will, however, say that I ran out of locks and cases securing the man's ordnance and had to run out to get more.
I'm a Xennial, Oregon trail, late gen X, elder millenial, whatever you want to call it. The surviving parents of my polycule are all Boomers. I realize I'm not the first person this is gonna happen to, and I'm gonna be far from the last.
So, if you're a gun owner:
One, try and at least be able to lock up all of your weapons at once.
Two, put in writing what you want to go to who in the event of your demise. Combinations to any safes should also be included in your will and similar papers.
So, if you wind up being an heir or an executor:
Whatever you find, point the muzzle in a safe direction, unload and clear. If you need them, Youtube should have tutorials. Last time youtube censored a lot of gun stuff, pornhub took up the slack.
You don't technically need a safe. Anything you can lock it inside and prevent fuckery should do the immediate job. Hard golf club cases can secure most long guns. Toolboxes and chests can secure pistols. Make sure they lock and the keys/combinations are kept secure.
Some states treat firearms like any other property as far as inheritance goes. Other states may have specific laws directing them. Check with your probate lawyer. And don't rely on being in a currently-red state to be a substitute for checking, either.
So, probate court is done, the state says they're yours now, and you don't want 'em.
What to do with them?
There's options.
One, you can ask a gun nut friend to help you get rid of them. Some may offer to buy them outright, others will help you with one of the other options.
You may have noticed in my sidebar above, but a common though morbid joke in the gun community is an older gent asking too high a price for a given weapon, to which the younger potential buyer will reply, "OK. I'll just buy it off your gun-hating kid at your estate sale."
It should go without saying that a GOOD gun nut friend will be more concerned for you than for a potential bargain. They'll still be *interested* in said bargain, but they'll care about you first.
Two, a number of gun shops and a number of pawn shops buy as well as sell. I keep saying that guns are like cars, and this is a place where that's true again: make, model, and condition will go a long way in determining the price you can get. In a straight sale, you *might* be able to get around 60% of what it can retail for on the used market. Your mileage varies a lot here.
Three, if you have a large collection (more than 10 or so) or several particularly valuable pieces, renting a table at a gun show might be an option. Especially if you've also inherited ammunition and/or accessories you've no use for. Unfortunately, unless you really know the market and are naturally good at sales, this option will likely be more of a hassle than it's worth.
Four, if you know how to sell on ebay, Gunbroker operates in a similar fashion, but with additional steps to make it legal. Choose an FFL near you (probably a local gun store). When you sell, take the weapon to said FFL, which will ship it to another FFL near the buyer (both of them taking a fee for their trouble) who will do the buyer's background check and finish the sale there.
Five, police buyback programs are sporadic, but chances are there's one happening in a major city near you sometime in the next year.
Six, if all else fails, you can surrender a firearm to a local police station. You might have to drop it off yourself (unloaded and in a box, please). They probably won't give you anything for it and will make no guarantees as to what happens to it next. But it will be out of your life and no longer your problem.
As always, hope the info helps.
Take care of yourselves out there,
- J.
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