Quotes
"Folks, the whole drinking from skulls of your enemies is a special occasion thing, like your Grandmother's good China. Don't spoil the fun with all the griping about spillage.
For one thing, licking spillage off a friend is perfectly acceptable in some cases.
For another thing, we've heard about corks. We're Barbarians, not Neanderthals."
"Learning guns is like learning English as a second language. The big rules and broad strokes of what's out there are easy enough to learn. But there's a million little exceptions, provisions, special rules and little minutiae out there, lying in wait for you to get one of them wrong. And what's worse, there isn't even close to a consensus on most of them, so your best guess could impress one person, embarrass the second, and send the third off into a twenty-minute rant.
The upside is if you commit any of those tiny sins with style and flair, you'll probably get away with it. Though there will always be someone grumbling in any case."
"So, while everyone was distracted by immigration policy, President Obama quietly expanded the combat mission in Afghanistan. Operation Enduring Freedom is now Operation Resolute Support. Operation Mission Creep was apparently too blunt."
"Between characters, a kill is like a kiss. It can be aggressive or reluctant, clumsy or skillful, passionate, polite, or perfunctory. It can linger for what feels like eternity or begin and end in an instant. And no matter how professionally executed or how much detachment is attempted, it always bears a personal touch."
- Personal Journal
"Chin down, ass up, that's the way we like to backfall."
I'm a bad, bad man.
- Heard on set
"Well, Gladiator might still have won an Oscar without their stunties.
Specifically, they might have won Best Live-Action Short."
- Said after hearing the Oscars have denied a stunts category yet again.
"Thinking of calling myself a freehammer.
Feels better in my hand and less likely to break on an opponent than a freelance."
- Facebook update
"The Latin motto is Certa bonum certamen.
The English motto is "Don't be stupid."
Intending to follow both tonight."
- Facebook update before stepping off for a night shoot.
"If you can read this, you have access to a way in which to tell someone you care about them.
Make it happen, savages."
- Facebook update, Christmas Eve 2013.
"Wrapped for lunch. who's going where?"
"Firehouse, mostly. But I think Jay wandered off to go take down an elk."
- Overheard on set
"Apparently, today is no bra day.
Therefore, I have secured and locked every bra in my possession in a gun case for the day.
Hell, it's about as effective as every other awareness-raising measure."
"That moment when I go, 'Fuck sword & shield! Lemme find the right balance point and I'll do sword & bardiche!' Just because I can..."
"I was asked once about how the broadsword evolved into the rapier.
And it was kind of a challenge to come up with something concise that incorporated the continuing argument of cut vs. thrust, the ensuing gunpowder era, and the rise of the merchant class.
Then I shrugged and said, 'Fuck it. Lawyers, guns, and money. There's your answer in a nutshell.'"
"When more column inches are devoted to your show's casualties than performances, you are officially fucked up."
- Reacting to Spider-man: Turn off the Dark.
At what point does "Strike while the iron is hot" become "did you just beat the shit out of an anvil?"
Being there for someone's first shot is special.
Being there for someone's first full-auto burst is just sweet.
I am a grownup.
According to Rufio's Theorem, I am therefore a pirate.
Might as well dress accordingly. Arr!
"Good shooters, really good shooters, are cut from the same cloth as precision drivers.
Their skill lies in taking a conglomerate of moving parts and chemical reactions and turning it into a living thing in their hands, reacting to their express will."
For one thing, licking spillage off a friend is perfectly acceptable in some cases.
For another thing, we've heard about corks. We're Barbarians, not Neanderthals."
"Learning guns is like learning English as a second language. The big rules and broad strokes of what's out there are easy enough to learn. But there's a million little exceptions, provisions, special rules and little minutiae out there, lying in wait for you to get one of them wrong. And what's worse, there isn't even close to a consensus on most of them, so your best guess could impress one person, embarrass the second, and send the third off into a twenty-minute rant.
The upside is if you commit any of those tiny sins with style and flair, you'll probably get away with it. Though there will always be someone grumbling in any case."
"So, while everyone was distracted by immigration policy, President Obama quietly expanded the combat mission in Afghanistan. Operation Enduring Freedom is now Operation Resolute Support. Operation Mission Creep was apparently too blunt."
"Between characters, a kill is like a kiss. It can be aggressive or reluctant, clumsy or skillful, passionate, polite, or perfunctory. It can linger for what feels like eternity or begin and end in an instant. And no matter how professionally executed or how much detachment is attempted, it always bears a personal touch."
- Personal Journal
"Chin down, ass up, that's the way we like to backfall."
I'm a bad, bad man.
- Heard on set
"Well, Gladiator might still have won an Oscar without their stunties.
Specifically, they might have won Best Live-Action Short."
- Said after hearing the Oscars have denied a stunts category yet again.
"Thinking of calling myself a freehammer.
Feels better in my hand and less likely to break on an opponent than a freelance."
- Facebook update
"The Latin motto is Certa bonum certamen.
The English motto is "Don't be stupid."
Intending to follow both tonight."
- Facebook update before stepping off for a night shoot.
"If you can read this, you have access to a way in which to tell someone you care about them.
Make it happen, savages."
- Facebook update, Christmas Eve 2013.
"Wrapped for lunch. who's going where?"
"Firehouse, mostly. But I think Jay wandered off to go take down an elk."
- Overheard on set
"Apparently, today is no bra day.
Therefore, I have secured and locked every bra in my possession in a gun case for the day.
Hell, it's about as effective as every other awareness-raising measure."
"That moment when I go, 'Fuck sword & shield! Lemme find the right balance point and I'll do sword & bardiche!' Just because I can..."
"I was asked once about how the broadsword evolved into the rapier.
And it was kind of a challenge to come up with something concise that incorporated the continuing argument of cut vs. thrust, the ensuing gunpowder era, and the rise of the merchant class.
Then I shrugged and said, 'Fuck it. Lawyers, guns, and money. There's your answer in a nutshell.'"
"When more column inches are devoted to your show's casualties than performances, you are officially fucked up."
- Reacting to Spider-man: Turn off the Dark.
At what point does "Strike while the iron is hot" become "did you just beat the shit out of an anvil?"
Being there for someone's first shot is special.
Being there for someone's first full-auto burst is just sweet.
I am a grownup.
According to Rufio's Theorem, I am therefore a pirate.
Might as well dress accordingly. Arr!
"Good shooters, really good shooters, are cut from the same cloth as precision drivers.
Their skill lies in taking a conglomerate of moving parts and chemical reactions and turning it into a living thing in their hands, reacting to their express will."
